Last week we talked about how being spiritually centered, knowing how to turn inward to find strength, and choosing gratitude facilitate our happiness. This week let’s tip the scale even further – toward joy.
Clearly, this is an expansive topic, and I’m not writing a book series or even a single book, so for today, I’ll limit myself to two brilliant sources and only a few fantastic concepts.
First, we’ll start with an idea from Brendon Burchard. (Again. What can I say? The guy teaches oodles of powerful principles!)
Brendon loves to say power plants don’t have energy; they generate it. Bringing joy generates energy. This video has more on the topic, but for our purposes today let’s focus on the fact that living in joy is a choice.
OUR EMOTIONS - OUR CHOICE.
Get happy. I learned this simple phrase from a dear friend. I heard her say it to her kids and herself on many occasions when they were wasting energy fussing about something they couldn’t change. She doesn’t mean for anyone to ignore their feelings and plaster on a Pollyanna smile. She uses the little phrase as a reminder to process emotions and make a choice that serves better in that situation.
No one makes you anything. I’m sure my kids got sick of hearing me say this. Every time they would say, “They make me so mad,” or, “That made me happy,” or any sentence using the words make(s) or made in conjunction with emotion, they were reminded that no one makes them anything. They choose their response.
Our second source today is a talk called “Come What May and Love It” given by a wise man named Joseph B. Wirthlin.
Come What May and Love It
Life inescapably comes at us…and it’s not always pleasant. I’ve adapted his remarks, but strongly recommend clicking through and taking a few minutes to read or watch his entire talk.
LEARN TO LAUGH
I know you’ve had mornings like I have when I’ve slept through my alarm, spilled my whole smoothie all over myself and my floor on my way out the door, gotten overrun by customers and ringing phones from the moment I got to work, only to notice two hours later when I finally had a moment to breathe that the shirt I changed into after the smoothie incident had a lovely stain right on the front for all to see. Because of a wise friend who taught me the value of humor, on those mornings, instead of seething with frustration, I can laugh at how ridiculous life can be.
Learning to laugh when we may rather wince, whine, or curse the heavens is not only good for our physical and mental health, it makes life much more enjoyable for us and those around us.
SEEK FOR THE ETERNAL
This is Big Picture thinking that we’ve talked about before. A part of what makes challenges and frustrations so intense is how easy it is to get lost in them. They demand our focus.
Moments (or days, weeks, or years) of opposition, are so much more bearable if we have the presence of mind to step back and seek to understand the more significant purpose being served. What lessons can we learn? How can our compassion be increased? How can our character be refined and our understanding increased?
To quote Joseph Wirthlin, “Sometimes the very moments that seem to overcome us with suffering are those that will ultimately suffer us to overcome.”
THE PRINCIPLE OF COMPENSATION
This is a huge one; it requires vision in a big way. I don’t know about you, but every single one of the most difficult trials I’ve faced in life has become one of my most treasured experiences.
Every. Single. One.
Why? The compensation I’ve received from them. The things I’ve learned, the ways I’ve grown, and the strength I’ve gained are gifts I wouldn’t trade away for anything.
If I could be offered some kind of cosmic trade where I could go back in time and not have a particular soul-stretching experience, but the cost would be that I’d have to give up what I gained from it, there’s nothing on earth or in heaven that could persuade me to take that trade. That’s the principle of compensation.
And it’s real.
TRUST
For Christians, this takes the form of trusting our loving Father and His Son. For non-Christians, it takes the form of trusting that something bigger than ourselves is at work. In either case, as we lean into our difficulties, concerns, and frustrations from a place of trust, knowing we’re not alone and that good can come even from the hardest of hardships, we can receive peace and even joy in life’s challenges.
As we choose to bring the joy, learn to laugh, seek for the eternal, recognize the principle of compensation, and live in a place of trust, we go a long way toward living a life infused with joy.